Lazy Dreamer

I've always been lazy...

I prefer to sit alone...

In my room and doors locked...

Nothing dirty ever happens...

Just my mind wandering around...

Getting ideas about life...

My life.

But I hardly ever do anything about it...

I just go on dreaming...

That's why I'm a lazy dreamer...

I keep going with conversations...

With myself...

And the help of my imagination...

I go far that way.

Of course...

Reality is...

I'm still quite the lazy dreamer...

But I've got to earn some dough...

Put food on the table...

Put clothes over our skins...

Put a roof over our heads...

Being in a condo, we share the roof with many...

So I just gotta make sure there's these 4 walls around us...

Somehow...

I feel complete.

I am hereby accepting myself...

I am a lazy dreamer.

Restless

Yes...

It's been sucking...

I'm in tremendous stress...

Frustration...

Emo like mad.

But all inside lah...

On the front...

I can still smile...

I can joke...

Laugh...

But never...

Never do I even pretend that everything is fine and dandy.

Gotta keep it real...

Recession has taken its toll on me...

And everyone around me...

But you know they say...

The only way to go after you've gone all the way down...

is UP.

I believe this is a period I have to go through...

Survive this and it'll be good...

I've seen my dad and mom gone through this...

Now I understand...

I appreciate them more...

Also I learn how support is magical...

Without it...

It's almost impossible...

Thank God I still have my support systems...

I truly appreciate.

Well now I'm hoping to turn things around...

Slowly...

Baby steps...

Just try to stay ahead of the currant...

I'm strong ok.

Emoless

I don't know what is going on...

I'm not even sure if I care too much...

But it has been quite some hours now...

Pacing back and forth urls...

Doing the same thing...

Hoping to get inspired...

Maybe this is writer's block...

Or maybe this is just a sign of surrender...

Hmmm...

Not that's not it...

It's just not entirely progressive right now...

Maybe soon...

Or later...

Whatever.

Oh Mother!

My mother said a terrible thing last night...

It wasn't rude or insulting...

It is however damaging...

She is right y'know...

Should I stop now before it's too late?

When is too late?

She should only hope she gets it all back...

I could only feel horrible about myself since...

Perhaps I should be asking the question...

But who do I ask?

When do I ask?

What exactly do I say?

Oh Mother!

This isn't easy...

Not for you and not for me...

Lets just make a decision shall we?

Go Do Do

You know what sucks?

An old friend used to answer "vacuum cleaner"...

Which I thought was competely lame...

Still is super lame...

But what really sucks...

Is wanting to start but no idea where!

Sure everyone have their bad day...

Everyone goes blur...

But I'm going blurer by the minute...

I need a pick-me-up...

What shall it be?

Ah...

Menstrual pills!

Ding Dong Bell

Halo Halo!

It's been a while I know...

But so what?

Semuanya di atas alasan peribadi...

Why "ding dong"?

Because this is the time for "ding dong"...

No, no, no...

Bukan snek makanan deng dang...

But ding dong!

Apa itu ding dong?

Ia merupakan suatu perbuatan yang boleh dianggap kejam tetapi dilapisi dengan ayat-ayat manis dan pengotaan kata-kata palsu demi mempertahankan air muka yang kian lama kian menipis akibat cengkaman maut daripada krisis ekonomi dunia

Ia amat popular di kalangan pemilik-pemilik perniagaan terkemuka, kuli-kuli batak yang terasa hebat dan terasa seperti keputusan di tangan mereka, mereka-mereka yang mula kerja pukul 7.30 pagi tapi ambil waktu sarapan selama 1 jam dan 2 jam kemudian sudah menjamah makan tengah hari dan diikuti minum petang sebelum menamatkan "kerja" pada jam 3.30 petang. Sudah tentu yang paling mempraktikkan amalan ding dong ini adalah para-para penghebah kita yang juga dikenali sebagai ahli-ahli politik sejagat.

Memang benar...

Aku dilanda krisis ding dong ini...

Namun aku masih gagah berdiri...

Sekali-sekala je tersungkur secara ganas...

Namun tetap kutahan Jebat!

Last night I wrote something...

Long, emotional and angry...

Self-motivation I say...

On what I must do...

I'm not sure how that's working out...

I need to this...

I need to that...

But when you're hit by the "ding Dong" crisis...

You're fucking screwed!!!

So don't mind my silence...

I have to focus on dinging the Dong.

It works

No surprise I guess...

It works...

Email posting...

Solves a lot of shites...

Heck...

Not as if I'm gonna change.