I need juice. Lots of juice. Not the kind with pulps. Not too much fibre in it too. I just need it smooth and keep it coming. Like free tab or something. Maybe it's just coffee I desire. Ok enough drink drama. I need to get serious with my shit.
See, I don't know if I hate my job or actually love the idea of my job. Ideally, this is good. But really, it sucks. (Note to self: Get A Foot Stool). Comfort is vital. At home, at work, in the kitchen, while driving and friendship. All of these are part of my daily life. Just that lately, it is quite dreadful to go about it. Nothing inspires. Nothing pushes me to the edge. I want to be on that edge. The exciting kind of edge. Not the one where you fall of the cliff and break every bones in your body.
The only kind of edge I feel is not really edge just stress. Financially I'm crappy. My life and soul feels empty. I'd be lying if I told you that money does nothing to me. It does a lot to me apparently. I got some but I want more. But is money my motivation? Na-uh. I discovered that it isn't. At the moment I'm forgetting my motivation. I had one. I have to go back in time to find it. Crap right? Yeah I know.
Now it's the part for the truth. I AM SIMPLY LAZY MAN! What's the cure for laziness seriously? There isn't any! No matter what you do, if you're a fuckin' lazy ass bitch then I say just live with it. Once in a while, things get done. Happy or not? Well that's individual prerogative. I personally feel nothing when being lazy but I know when to stop. I'd feel like dying. Lethargic and over exhaustion would be your first sign. So then get off your ass and go out. Refresh, rejuvenate and relive.
I know I'm not making any sense right now. Just that I had this idea that if I put everything down right now, I'd just be all new. I don't think it's really working but at least my nonsense is off my chest. Believe me I want something else off my chest too. But that is kind of a permanent fixture. I don't like it too much. One day I'll get it reduced. But you see, money is now the problem so that ain't going to happen soon.
Damn it is really hot these days. The best is to just stay naked all day and indoors. But a part of me wants to get out, go see the world, take pictures and upload. Yeah that's what FB do to me. In my defense, I haven't uploaded anything in ages. I haven't been out in ages. Wait I haven't been out with a camera in ages. That explains it.
I seem to find myself disappearing particularly on a Friday. It's like it don't exist. It comes, it brings excitement with it but I am just not one of those people who get turned on by it. It has no effect on me. Don't get me wrong, I used to feel for Friday. Hey "it's Friday I'm in love". There used to be a purpose. There use to be a reason to celebrate. But now, it disappears with me.
Simple get-together over say a glass of iced tea was actually a routine. Routine being routines, it bores you after a while. To bore me is simply easy. I get fed up with the same old crap bag stories and insults. I get tired of meaningless laughters and offended quite so often. Now I wait once a year to do all that. It gives me a bit of joy because I don't really want to go back to routine hang out. I like the annual stuff. Well honestly, it won't hurt if it was a monthly thing. However should we just recap "I AM LAZY!".
What the hell am I so lazy about?
For one, I am beyond the notion of driving. I feel tired just starting up the engine. Don't even get started on leaving the gate. I live in Damansara Perdana where leaving the area is a chore. I work around the area too so it should give me some motivation to actually leave the area but I tend to go into hiding mode. Now that work gets done in the house, I have no place to hide. Actually I rarely get any work done. Go figure.
OMG I am so lazy that I didn't even post this up yesterday. Yes I wrote this yesterday. After getting some exciting news about a project, I totally lacked the desire to whine. So here goes.